Unbelievable. It may or may not be evident, so I’ll just go ahead and say this for the record: I am not a homosexual. “Not that there’s anything wrong with it!” We all know I use a variety of internetdating sites. Most of them involve filling out a profile and then setting up your preferences: ethnicity, age, distance, body type, profession, etc. One of the most important ones: what gender you are looking for. I clearly stated that I am a Man seeking a Woman. And somehow, Match.com thought it would befunny to imply that my miserable rate of success of online dating just might be solved if I would turn gay.
See, I had decided to finally return to my account at Match.com. Both eHarmony and Chemistry were not yielding any form of contact whatsoever. I looked over my profile to check that it still reflected who I am. It did, so I clicked on the mutual matching link. And lo and behold.
There was a photo of a man.
He was okay looking. A black fellow with glasses and an average grin.
Unfortunately,I’m not attracted to men. I’m sure I would make a lovely and very qualified homosexual bachelor, but I’m just afraid that I’m not inclined towards a life of anal sex, neither receiving nor giving. I was pretty outraged. I’m not homophobic and I’ve got nothing against homosexuals. But c’mon. I clicked on mutual matches. So what’s with the gay guy?I suppose I’m going to have to write in about that. It seems pretty absurd to me, unless they’re purposefully playing some kind of cruel trick on me.