Eden Lake: How not to survive a gang of hoodlums

So, Eden Lake is about a young couple who goes off to some lake to relax. They come across a gang of hoodlums, young kids who couldn’tve grad­uated high school yet. Teens. I’m not gonna summarize the movie, but I will comment on some scenes that I reacted to.

Mistake #1 — The hoodlums first come onto the beach, bringing with them a large aggressive dog and blasting their music. The boyfriend tries to ask them to turn it down. The alpha thug is clearly being a dick, making a hard time for him.

When asking someone for courtesy, avoid using any insults and remain neutral in tone and language. Don’t use words like “dick”. Be diplo­matic, and do not escalate the situ­ation. If asking nicely does not work, there is no reason to believe that anything else will convince them to comply with your request. Someone who is clearly aggressive and unco­op­er­ative cannot be reasoned with.

Mistake #2 — The couple’s bag was stolen. In it were their car keys, wallet, and cell­phone. The car was stolen as well. The two of them go looking for the bag and car. The boyfriend confronts the gang, somewhat aggres­sively. The alpha thug shows his edged weapon, and a short fight ensues. The result: the gang’s dog is stabbed to death by accident.

When you’re going to enter hostile territory, don’t bring your girl­friend. She is a liability. She can easily be over­powered, and can be used against you as leverage. Instead, if you can, have her hidden away, out of sight but observing your situ­ation. Have a plan if some­thing goes wrong. Don’t expose her to danger.

Don’t engage in combat unless you have both the intention and capa­bility of disabling or killing every last one of the assailants. With the possi­bility of an edged weapon, and five assailants (or six?), you had better not engage without an equalizer. Even a long branch will even up the game consid­erably. Their edged weapons require close range. Even without proper training a branch can be rather effective.

Mistake #3 -  The couple run off to the car appar­ently with car keys in hand. They try to escape with by car but lose control of their vehicle and crash. The hoodlums capture the boyfriend, binding him with barbed wire and proceed to inflict wounds with their edged weapons, causing massive damage. Main thing here: don’t get caught.

This could’ve all been avoided if they kept a cool head and tried to escape and notify local law enforcement. The preser­vation of life and the safety of yourself and loved ones is of utmost priority. The boyfriend had a big ego and decided to try to get involved. And well, he ended up all gashed up and ulti­mately dead. Not to mention the later demise of his girlfriend.

These situ­a­tions are a test of one’s mettle. It takes a bigger man to under­stand that some­times there is no room for pride and ego. The threat to a loved one’s safety should be taken very seri­ously, and it’s rather foolish to place oneself in harm’s way. It certainly is natural to feel a little emas­cu­lated by being bullied by a bunch of “12-year olds”, but I’d much rather be happy and alive with the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. As for some discus­sions of revenge on the IMDB message boards, I quote Master Po of TV show Kung Fu: “Vengeance is a water vessel with a hole. It carries nothing but the promise of emptiness.”