Change. It’s never good. Roughly two months ago, I decided to change my barber. It was cheaper and closer to home. I had made the decision to go for a classic haircut: slicked back hair. I had grownout my hair for those two months. Today, I return to that same barber, in hopes that he will be competent and be able to manage to shape my hair into what I envision.
I walked to the barbershop through the crisp chilliness of the gray morning air. I was a little less bundled up than usual, wearing only my spring coat. It was a short walk, so I didn’t care so much. Plus, I didn’t want hair to be stuck in my nicer wool coat.
Through the door I walked. I was offered the seat by the old Chinese man who cut my hair my previous visit. He knew who I was, remembering that I had initially walked in with hair that was grown from a formerly very short haircut. He asked me how I wanted it cut. I explained that I wanted to just stick with basically what I already had, but to thin out the back. I told him I wanted the silhouette of my hair to be more squarish than round.With my request, I took off my glasses and off he went. Much to my demise. He started with clippers. At first, I wasn’t to concerned. I figured it was standard to take off the fuzzy little curls that creep out at the edges after two months of unkempt growth. Then he started to buzz away a little more. Then some more. Now, I can’t see very well without my glasses, so I couldn’t quite tell what he was doing. By the time I realized he was buzzing away a little too happily, it was too late.He had taken off all the little curls and wisps of hair that stuck out around the ears and at the bottom of my skull. He had also managed to shorten about two inches too high. The hair that used to be long and sleek at the sides of my head are now short and kind of sticking out. I also no longer have sideburns.
I got my hair washed, and afterwards he styled it a little bit for me with some hairspray and some spray mousse of some sort. It was in no way reminiscent of the hair style that I walked in with. I told him that I wanted it sleeked straight back. He added some more mousse and just fussed it up a little bit more. Still nothing like what I camein with.He even had the goddamned audacity to say that what I as asking for wasn’t stylish nowadays. I just decided to get the hell out of there and go home.
The second I stepped into my bathroom I grabbed my American Crew grooming cream and scooped out a a good sized dollop of it and rubbed it into my hair. Could I save it? I spent probably fifteen minutes trying this way and that. But it was useless. The hair that I spent so long growing out, it wasn’t coming back. That sleek slicked back look I was going for, gone. The sides were irreparable.
I was fucking pissed off. How do you fuck up a simple haircut? I asked for him to keep it the same style, just to shorten it a little bit and thin it out in the back. I come out with some fucking horseshit combination of a buzz cut on the sides with the same slicked back hair on top. What the fuck? I paid a measly $9 for the haircut plus $4 for the hair wash. I am not going back. It’s different with long hair: it takes time to grow, and you just don’t fuck with it. You just don’t. If I had a bad haircut with short hair, it wouldn’t matter as much because the silhouette would change in about a week or two when the hair started to grow anyway. But long hair? Don’t fuck it up!
Instead, I’m going to follow the advice I have always given everyone else: you get what you pay for. Okay, that’s a saying, not a piece of advice. But whatever. I’m going to be looking for a real fucking hair stylist who knows how to cut a classic slick back. Fuck paying less. I need a real professional who can cut my hair the way I want it.
Lesson: don’t go to a cheap barber if you care about your hair.
The funny thing is that when I woke up this morning and styled my hair, it looked great: pretty much the exact way I wanted it. I only needed the edges cleaned up because Luanne’s birthday is tomorrow. Otherwise, I would’ve probably waited until around the start of the spring semester before I got a haircut.
In which case, I guess it’s better that I took this haircut. At least I have the chance to grow out the sides more before the classes start. I only have to suffer through one day of bad hair: tomorrow. Yeah, looking on the bright side…that’s always better.